If men need to improve the quality of intimacy, it is clear feedback which reflects something they've been doing wrongly.  The quality of intimacy won't improve unless he does something to improve it.  Placing the responsibility of improving it on others won't get him anywhere either. So no excuse - one must work to reap rewards.  He can do so in these simple pleasant ways.  Try them. You will only gain benefits from them in others spheres of life too!

1. Eat healthily, enough, properly

Āyurveda - the science of life - has been the first science to teach civilisations for more than 5,000 years that all disease and malaise comes from impaired gastric fire. If you eat healthy, not processed, correctly combined food appropriate for your dosha in appropriate quantities and manner at appropriate times max 3 times a day and twice in old age, you'll enjoy life of high quality. You can then easily enjoy any activity, make and spread love. When the stomach is full, you feel happy. Quality food brings quality thoughts and clear mind. But...

2. Clean your heart and soul

of grudges, lies, suppressed feelings. Say what you mean, mean what you say. Be honest. Speak what you feel even if it is ugly or politically incorrect. Let go of worrying that you will offend. You won't in most cases. In fact people will appreciate, admire, trust, and respect you for honesty. And when you offend, the fact that you offended is a problem of the person who offended himself. He chose to be offended instead of taking your feedback as an opportunity to grow. That's his deal. You cannot and should not want to control it. Control what you can and control it to the benefit of your clean heart, soul, conscience. A clean spirit [=heart+soul] = healthy libido. This reflects how men improve the quality of intimacy.

3. Low libido, feeling miserably or depressed?

See point 1. And then point 2. And then... where are you looking?  If you're looking down which is where your feelings are, raise the eyes to the sky. Things will look brighter. So you will lose many bad feelings, and may even laugh! Hence it’s the cheapest and healthiest antidepressant certainly worth trying. The long-term way not to get depressed is eating healthily, regularly exercising appropriately for your dosha,  and sleeping enough at regular times correct for your dosha. Plus it consists of having a direction, goals, challenges, and interests which build your body, mind, social contacts, creativity, and future.

4. Do bad experiences frustrate, annoy, or upset you?

Ask what can I learn from it? You will certainly find something good. If you really learn it, you will not have the same or similar bad experiences again. You will act according to what you learned instead. Millions of men from every culture improve intimacy exactly this way.

5. Grounding = another simple way for men to improve intimacy

The base of the spine and the buttocks are particularly common places to hurt when we are not grounded. You are also not grounded if you have a thousand things going through the head at once. Stand or sit upright. Send the pain or thoughts through (the chair and) your feet into the  ground. If you can let go of it like this, it isn't serious. Take a deep breath, hold it for a second, exhale, hold it for a second. Your head will feel clear. Regular massage is also magical in the long term! Ayurveda has other genial tools for grounding.  I'll gladly give them to you if you ask.

6. If you believe that you can do something

or likewise if you believe that you can't, you will be right either way. What you believe you will achieve! So choose carefully. If you believe that you are an adequate lover, you will be. If you put yourself down, you will be down. In other words if you are confident, you will do well.  If you are not confident, you will attract the worse of life. That is one cause of so many problems with erection.

7. Does your head often ache?

See point 1. It starts there. Then ask the aching head what it is telling you. The message is often very simple: hunger,  water, air, less stress, less focus, move. Or see point 5 and ground yourself. Hence think how you can help yourself and notice what happens to the aching head. Regular head massage makes heads ache less often. I invite all men to improve intimacy by this pleasant form.

8. Use your imagination

for all the good things you will do this week, month, season, year. Get clear pictures, sounds, and feelings together to really focus you on success. Men do this exceptionally well in the context of intimacy.

9. Surround yourself by people

who inspire you, with whom you feel good, whom you respect, trust, admire. End all toxic relationships as soon as you can, because ending them will be good for health. Free yourself from people who are artificially polite instead of honest. Because toxic people are toxic to the body and the quality of intimacy. I help men do so when they don't know where or how to start.

10. Men who open their minds improve intimacy by horizons

Minds are like parachutes - they function only when they are open. Fear of something is far worse than the thing itself. But be clear about what open mind means. Many people say that they have open minds. But when you suggest something very different from that which is in the spheres of their worlds, they will dismiss it, Are such minds open? This inevitably happens in intimacy too.  Think about it... Some good coaching opens minds like nothing else!

11. How loud is your inner critic?

You can spend so long criticising yourself after making mistakes and feeling terribly that you won't have the energy to step back, learn, move on. However bad the situation, there is always learning which you can take from it. Especially if you are a man of the pitta dosha, you know the inner critic very well... Turn the critic into a wise advisor. Again, some good coaching is ideal for showing you how. And well, the advisor will advise you on ways to improve intimacy too!

12. If an event distresses you,

clear the energy from the event. It really works. Regularly clearing your energy will change your life. You can clear your energy anywhere at any time. If you don't know how to clear the energy, I'll gladly show you. If you live with clear energy, the quality of intimacy will inevitably improve.

13. Men who notice success improve intimacy too

So notice successes instead of dismissing or belittling them. Start noticing what works, congratulate yourself, celebrate it, and see how you can do more.  All that will attract more success. Do the same in your intimate life.

14. Successful people

don't think about goals, but about the process to achieving them. Good results come almost as a surprise to many successful folks. This may also have an impact on traditional setting goals! Even for men who don't like setting goals.  Those men will definitely be interested only in the process of getting success. How does this apply to intimacy?

15.  Bring yourself light

People in sunny countries are happier for a reason. Sunshine. It is great for every cell of the body.   And therefore for our wellbeing. Light influences wellbeing. People in countries with little sunshine feel this fact. If you do not have enough money to go to countries with a lot of sunshine, there is another solution. Think of yourself as a mobile solar panel. Then imagine a golden ball of sunshine drifting to the top of your head and feel it filling you with lovely warmth. Good energy = good intimacy.

16. Men automatically improve intimacy with a smile

A smile is quite a funny thing - it wrinkles up your face,

and when it's gone you'll never find its secret hiding place.

But far more wonderful it is to see what smiles can do -

you smile at her, she smiles at you, and so one smile makes two.

I passed around the corner and someone saw my grin.

When he smiled I realised I'd passed it on to him!

I thought about that smile and then I realised its worth.

A single smile just like mine could travel around the earth!

If you feel a smile begin, don't leave it undetected.

Start an epidemic quick and get the world infected!

17. When you are ill,

notice what you tell yourself. If you tell yourself that you're not well, you will stay ill. Likewise, if you imagine what it will be like when you are healthy and if you are grateful for small improvements, you will certainly get what you imagine. The better and faster you can help your healing, the better your intimacy will be.

18. What does intimacy mean to you?

Is it the same as sex? Or is there more to it than sex? Can intimacy happen without sex? How do you define intimacy? When you make this clear, you will know what you want. And you will know when you find it.

19. See what happens

if you suspend judgement of something. It is just an event, therefore you don't have to judge whether it is good or bad. It is simply something that happens or happened.

20. Give pleasure space, time, attention

Very many men know transactional sex as the only answer to intimacy in today's world. There is hence no wonder that they are ever more deprived of intimacy. Humanity has made sex into a commodity of heavy consumerism, a weapon, a means of getting benefits. Everything that sex should not be. Men translate pleasure only as sex. They race for orgasms in many positions in a short time. They don't give themselves time to connect with sexual partners. Many men see connecting as hassle instead of an inevitable part of pleasure where all intimacy begins. Paying for sex is a hassle free shortcut to intimacy. Well, no. Every man who has paid prostitutes knows well that prostitutes don't sell intimacy. This is why the adult industry does not fulfill its role in society. And will not because it will become only more commercial.

Pleasure is far more than sex. Pleasure needs space, time, and attention in order to be pleasurable and satisfying. So give pleasure space, time, and attention. These 3 factors are the leverage to improving the quality of intimacy. Then you're welcome to share moments of pleasure even with me!

All men can improve the quality of intimacy

Some men can do it alone, others with a little help of someone with more perspectives.  That's how I add value to the lives of older professional men. And that's how I can add value to yours. And that's how you will consequently add value to people in your life. So would you like me to explore?